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Friday, February 27, 2009
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Big Questions
I speak frequently about awareness of knowing where you are right now. As a coach I am frequently asked to help people get where they want to go. I often say coaching is a lot like a good map or a GPS. It can show the route, but you must do the work to get there.
If you have ever used google maps for directions you know it asks 2 questions, start address and ending destination. If you called me on the phone for directions, the first thing I would ask you is where are you at now? So I ask you "Where are you now?"
Take an inventory of where you are at now? What resources are at your disposal? Are you aimed in the right direction at your goals? Do you know the direction of your goals? What are your beliefs? What are you telling yourself? WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?
Last week there seemed to be a theme in much of my interactions with people about another big question. This came up in a leads group I attend and it is a big coaching question, "What do you want?" Now this question must be put into situational perspective and it must be applied with, intensity and sincerity. We often think we know what we want, like money, but the truth is we want the money to buy the thing we really want--a new car, a bigger house, a maid, a boat. So I ask you what do you want? Stop and think for a minute. What lies in your deepest desires? What do you seek? Wisdom? Freedom? Clarity? A worry free life? A vacation? WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT?
The answer to the previous question will help establish the ending destination I spoke of earlier. That question will define the goals you are chasing, the port that your ship is aimed at. “It is not the going out of port, but the coming in, that determines the success of a voyage.” ~Henry Ward Beecher.
The final big question is an internal measurement, an internal compass that will let you know as you get closer to your port. How will you know when you've got it? Often people reach a goal they put down on the paper, but they feel no satisfaction from achieving it. Usually these individuals did not put down what they really wanted and they didn't take an accurate measurement of how they will know when they got it. Sometimes it is easy, we want a car. Say you want an Escalade. You want it because of how it makes you feel, the way it drives, and it's safety record. How will you know when you've got it? You will be driving the Escalade, feeling safe and confident. Other times you will need to define the measurement a little better, because the payoff isn't quite as cut and dry. For example, I want organization in my life and in my home. How will I know when I have it? This gets a little tougher.
This question is designed to help create SMART goals and to help us associate the emotions related to our desires and goals. When we use emotion on our side it is a powerful ally. Emotion creates inspiration, drive and purpose to our actions. HOW WILL YOU KNOW WHEN YOU HAVE GOT IT?
If you have ever used google maps for directions you know it asks 2 questions, start address and ending destination. If you called me on the phone for directions, the first thing I would ask you is where are you at now? So I ask you "Where are you now?"
Take an inventory of where you are at now? What resources are at your disposal? Are you aimed in the right direction at your goals? Do you know the direction of your goals? What are your beliefs? What are you telling yourself? WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?
Last week there seemed to be a theme in much of my interactions with people about another big question. This came up in a leads group I attend and it is a big coaching question, "What do you want?" Now this question must be put into situational perspective and it must be applied with, intensity and sincerity. We often think we know what we want, like money, but the truth is we want the money to buy the thing we really want--a new car, a bigger house, a maid, a boat. So I ask you what do you want? Stop and think for a minute. What lies in your deepest desires? What do you seek? Wisdom? Freedom? Clarity? A worry free life? A vacation? WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT?
The answer to the previous question will help establish the ending destination I spoke of earlier. That question will define the goals you are chasing, the port that your ship is aimed at. “It is not the going out of port, but the coming in, that determines the success of a voyage.” ~Henry Ward Beecher.
The final big question is an internal measurement, an internal compass that will let you know as you get closer to your port. How will you know when you've got it? Often people reach a goal they put down on the paper, but they feel no satisfaction from achieving it. Usually these individuals did not put down what they really wanted and they didn't take an accurate measurement of how they will know when they got it. Sometimes it is easy, we want a car. Say you want an Escalade. You want it because of how it makes you feel, the way it drives, and it's safety record. How will you know when you've got it? You will be driving the Escalade, feeling safe and confident. Other times you will need to define the measurement a little better, because the payoff isn't quite as cut and dry. For example, I want organization in my life and in my home. How will I know when I have it? This gets a little tougher.
This question is designed to help create SMART goals and to help us associate the emotions related to our desires and goals. When we use emotion on our side it is a powerful ally. Emotion creates inspiration, drive and purpose to our actions. HOW WILL YOU KNOW WHEN YOU HAVE GOT IT?
- Where are you at right now?
- What do you want?
- How will you know when you have got it?
WARNING: Use these question with caution, they may cause uncontrolled goal setting and lead to success in you life. If used on a daily basis, these questions can lead to positive habit development and positive lifestyle choices. If you become addicted to these questions please consult a professional immediately. Not intended for children under 3 years of age, let them enjoy their innocence.
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